I live in the woods. Our house is surrounded by 50 foot trees that in the summer form a canopy over us. Some would say our location is park like. And it is beautiful. However, there is a problem - at least for me. It is sooooo dark. Even on the brightest sunniest day at noon I have to have the lights on. I have come to realize that the darkness has a direct impact on my mood and my energy level. I need light.
So, when it came time to set up my home office I went for bright colors...creamsicle and periwinkle with lots of bright oranges, greens and purples. It gives me the illusion of light anyway.
I mention this because our environment can have a huge effect on our energy levels. Laura Stack in her book The Exhaustion Cure says that everything from discomfort at our desks, to the amount of light and noise surrounding us, to temperature even smells can rob us of our energy.
Have you done an environmental audit of your living and working space? Does the space you work in energize you or does it rob you of your energy (and I'm just talking physical space now)? What about your home environment? Is there a way you can create an environmentally energetic "me" space that will restore your energy and keep you focused on your ability to be engaged?
For me the answer may be beyond a cheery office but for the time being it is my energy haven in a draining dark environment. What is yours?
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Rust Out
I just read a short piece by Richard Leider and Steve Buchhoz form their book The Rustout Syndrome and I want to share it with you. Here it is:
"There's a silent killer that stalks America. It's called rustout and it's far more deadly and scary than burnout. Sure, burnout can wear down your body, but rustout can wipe out your soul and your spirit.
Rustout is the slow death that follows when we stop making the choices that keep life alive. It's the feeling of numbness that comes from always taking the safe way, never accepting new challenges, continually surrendering to the day-to-day routine. Rustout means we ae no longer growing, but at best, are simply maintaining. It implies that we have traded the sensation of life for the secruity of a paycheck...or the status quo. Rustout is the opposite of burnout. Burnout is over doing. Rustout is underdoing."
Many times in our hurrying around and over doing we are really settling for the status quo and not being willing to accept the new challenge of taking care of ourselves. We are so enmeshed in the day to day routine that we don't even realize that we are rusting out, not fully living life.
Do we in our attempts to overdo really short change ourselves by underdoing for ourselves?
"There's a silent killer that stalks America. It's called rustout and it's far more deadly and scary than burnout. Sure, burnout can wear down your body, but rustout can wipe out your soul and your spirit.
Rustout is the slow death that follows when we stop making the choices that keep life alive. It's the feeling of numbness that comes from always taking the safe way, never accepting new challenges, continually surrendering to the day-to-day routine. Rustout means we ae no longer growing, but at best, are simply maintaining. It implies that we have traded the sensation of life for the secruity of a paycheck...or the status quo. Rustout is the opposite of burnout. Burnout is over doing. Rustout is underdoing."
Many times in our hurrying around and over doing we are really settling for the status quo and not being willing to accept the new challenge of taking care of ourselves. We are so enmeshed in the day to day routine that we don't even realize that we are rusting out, not fully living life.
Do we in our attempts to overdo really short change ourselves by underdoing for ourselves?
Thursday, September 16, 2010
What Are You Pretending Not To Know?
Don't you love that question and secretly hate it at the same time? It comes from Susan Scott in her book Fierce Conversations where she suggests that the first thing we need to do in any situation is to 'interrogate reality'. The question she uses to do this is "What are you pretending not to know?"
Whenever we feel overwhelmed, underappreciated, or that we are unable to slow down and take care of ourselves, this question comes in handy. It's a tough question when we want to feel like a victim of our circumstances but it is an honest question. Because there are times when we can take time for ourselves, even if there are some disappointed people in our lives as a result. We don't have to be a slave to our schedule, our kids schedule or anyone else's unless we ignore the reality of our ability to choose, the reality that others are capable of stepping up, and the reality that our bodies and relationships cannot take unlimited pushing without breaking down.
So what is it that you are pretending not to know? Where are you accepting a 'myth' as reality rather than as an unrealistic expectation? What each of us thinks is true is really only a reflection of our world view or view of reality. And is that the whole truth, the whole picture? What is it we are not seeing or pretending not to see in our picture of reality?
How would tackling your toughest assumptions with a reality check change your life?
Whenever we feel overwhelmed, underappreciated, or that we are unable to slow down and take care of ourselves, this question comes in handy. It's a tough question when we want to feel like a victim of our circumstances but it is an honest question. Because there are times when we can take time for ourselves, even if there are some disappointed people in our lives as a result. We don't have to be a slave to our schedule, our kids schedule or anyone else's unless we ignore the reality of our ability to choose, the reality that others are capable of stepping up, and the reality that our bodies and relationships cannot take unlimited pushing without breaking down.
So what is it that you are pretending not to know? Where are you accepting a 'myth' as reality rather than as an unrealistic expectation? What each of us thinks is true is really only a reflection of our world view or view of reality. And is that the whole truth, the whole picture? What is it we are not seeing or pretending not to see in our picture of reality?
How would tackling your toughest assumptions with a reality check change your life?
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Your Wake
Did anyone have an opportunity to go boating this summer? When a boat cuts through the water it leaves a "wake". It's like a consequence in the water of the presence of the boat and the speed at which it moves. Many places along a lake shore or pier will have warning signs placed so boaters know that they are responsible for the size of the wake they leave behind.
The same is true for us. We are responsible for the wake we leave behind and the faster we move the larger the wake. Our wake, however, is more of an emotional one rather than a physical one. When we are moving through our lives at warp speed, we are going to create a wake that will wash over others. Perhaps we are short with a child, spouse or employee because we can't take the time to formulate a tactful response. Or, we forget something important - a lunch invitation, a birthday/anniversary, a permission slip - and others suffer the consequence due to our wake. And if we move far too fast far too often our wake will threaten to take us under, wipe us out (sickness), and put us out of commission. When we are out of commission by what we have done to ourself, everyone who depends on us suffers.
So how can we be responsible for our own emotional wake? First, be aware that we leave one with every interaction, conversation, or encounter we have. Then take a moment to think about the type of emotional wake we have left behind. Did we leave the person reeling, spinning and trying to regain their balance or did we provide a safe environment to reflect on the encounter? Ask yourself who is benefitting from the wake I leave or is my wake destructive wearing down relationships and breaking down the connections.
To do this we have to slow down to a reasonable speed in order to pay attention to who and what is around us and how our presence will effect them.
Let's just start with slowing and noticing. Next we can look at how to manage our wake in choppy waters.
The same is true for us. We are responsible for the wake we leave behind and the faster we move the larger the wake. Our wake, however, is more of an emotional one rather than a physical one. When we are moving through our lives at warp speed, we are going to create a wake that will wash over others. Perhaps we are short with a child, spouse or employee because we can't take the time to formulate a tactful response. Or, we forget something important - a lunch invitation, a birthday/anniversary, a permission slip - and others suffer the consequence due to our wake. And if we move far too fast far too often our wake will threaten to take us under, wipe us out (sickness), and put us out of commission. When we are out of commission by what we have done to ourself, everyone who depends on us suffers.
So how can we be responsible for our own emotional wake? First, be aware that we leave one with every interaction, conversation, or encounter we have. Then take a moment to think about the type of emotional wake we have left behind. Did we leave the person reeling, spinning and trying to regain their balance or did we provide a safe environment to reflect on the encounter? Ask yourself who is benefitting from the wake I leave or is my wake destructive wearing down relationships and breaking down the connections.
To do this we have to slow down to a reasonable speed in order to pay attention to who and what is around us and how our presence will effect them.
Let's just start with slowing and noticing. Next we can look at how to manage our wake in choppy waters.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Check Engine Light
The check engine light keeps coming on in my car. I go to the mechanic and he can't find anything wrong. So, I'm beginning to ignore it. Is that wise? Who knows? If I get stranded by the side of the road, I will know.
Sometimes don't you wish you had a check engine light on the "dashboard" of your life? When it starts to flash, we could stop and go get it checked out. And we would ignore it at our own peril.
Instead we go along pushing our bodies harder and harder sometimes running on fumes or worse yet empty. We might be limping along on one bald tire throwing our entire body out of alignment or we might forget to check the oil and before we know it we are broken down on the side of the road. I know the metaphor is a bit mixed and yet I also know that you can get my point from this because we have all ignored warning signs that our bodies were giving us that it was time for a tune up. The consequences haven't been pretty.
What is it in your body's warning system that signals you first that something might need attention? Do you get cranky and snap at everyone? Are you so tired that you secretly hope for a little cold to put you to bed for a day or so? Do your joints begin to ache from holding in your feelings? Is indigestion your first warning as you pop more and more antacids?
And when you think about taking care of yourself you decide you just don't have time and that things will slow down next week and you'll catch up on your sleep, eat better, exercise more. Only next week comes and nothing changes and you push on.
Our cars can't take that kind of non-care and function normally. Why do we think a complicated and marvelous machine like our bodies can? Why is it we take better care of our cars than we do ourselves? (And if your husband takes care of the car, you know how angry you would be if you ran out of gas or blew a tire or a white cloud of smoke on your way to work because he didn't take care of it).
Bottom line, my busy friends, check your engine light in your body today. What needs attending to, where do you need to go for this care and why are you waiting?
Take good care of yourself,
Nancy
Sometimes don't you wish you had a check engine light on the "dashboard" of your life? When it starts to flash, we could stop and go get it checked out. And we would ignore it at our own peril.
Instead we go along pushing our bodies harder and harder sometimes running on fumes or worse yet empty. We might be limping along on one bald tire throwing our entire body out of alignment or we might forget to check the oil and before we know it we are broken down on the side of the road. I know the metaphor is a bit mixed and yet I also know that you can get my point from this because we have all ignored warning signs that our bodies were giving us that it was time for a tune up. The consequences haven't been pretty.
What is it in your body's warning system that signals you first that something might need attention? Do you get cranky and snap at everyone? Are you so tired that you secretly hope for a little cold to put you to bed for a day or so? Do your joints begin to ache from holding in your feelings? Is indigestion your first warning as you pop more and more antacids?
And when you think about taking care of yourself you decide you just don't have time and that things will slow down next week and you'll catch up on your sleep, eat better, exercise more. Only next week comes and nothing changes and you push on.
Our cars can't take that kind of non-care and function normally. Why do we think a complicated and marvelous machine like our bodies can? Why is it we take better care of our cars than we do ourselves? (And if your husband takes care of the car, you know how angry you would be if you ran out of gas or blew a tire or a white cloud of smoke on your way to work because he didn't take care of it).
Bottom line, my busy friends, check your engine light in your body today. What needs attending to, where do you need to go for this care and why are you waiting?
Take good care of yourself,
Nancy
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)