Beginner's Mind

One of the things that trips us busy women up and keeps us from taking time for ourselves is a sense of "how" things are supposed to be done and "how" we are supposed to do them. In many ways we use an expert's mind to determine the path of good parenting, good housekeeping, good use of time, etc. We work hard to complete the scenario in our expert's mind of how we want things to be, how we want our house to look, how we know the neighbor's will react, how our husbands, children or significant other will feel about us if we don't or we do and how we will feel about us if we don't or do. And through it all we groan under the pressure of this concept formed in our "expert's mind". When I say expert's mind I mean the kind of thinking that tells us that there is only one way to do things. And that way would be our way because we know best.

Think about that, though. By thinking like an expert we forget about other possibilities, other options, or alternative approaches because we have it mapped out in our minds. We limit ourselves and we tie ourselves up in knots trying to create this perfect picture. (You know what I mean, don't you. Ever stay up late finishing the laundry because there won't be any clothes to wear in the morning if you don't sacrifice some sleep to complete the task. Really? Really!)

Suzuki Roshi talks about a beginner's mind. In a beginner's mind there are many possibilities. In an expert's only a few. Think of a child who has been given a gift. What is it that fascinates the child? Is the toy or gift? Usually no. It is the...BOX. And with that box the child begins to play, create alternative ways of using it, and is happy, happy, happy. We, however, think how awful that we spent so much on that toy and all they want is the box and we try to entice them back to the toy. A clear example of a beginner's mind and an expert's mind in action. And who is happier, more relaxed and totally enjoying the experience?

So as you struggle to find a way to have time for yourself, ask yourself: "Am I using an expert's mind or a beginner's mind?" Then, start to play a bit in the realm of the beginner's mind and see what possibilities there are for you!

What blessings, delights and surprises await you when you approach life from a beginner's mind perspective rather than an expert.